dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
