Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize