it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
