Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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