mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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