there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
