11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
