they need to just BURY HIM!
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
