puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
