i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
