Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Randomize
