I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
