Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize