There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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