i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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