every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
