East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
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