it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Randomize
