Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Randomize
