I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
