if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
We need to get me chipped asap
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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