So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
You took a bar mat shot.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
