Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
He passed out mid-signature
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
