no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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