Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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