today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
