I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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