this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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