So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
