Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
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