Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
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