If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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