I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
