This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
My breasts were aching with rage.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
