the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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