47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Randomize
