put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize