Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize