it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
