No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
