It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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