The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
