Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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