considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
