It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
