and you said cock pushups were impossible
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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