My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
