Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
