she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
