...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
