I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Randomize